Birthday wishlist

My birthday is coming up, and I'm not expecting any particularly revolutionary gifts; I'd rather spend time with friends than receive things. I just wanted to think about all of the crazy things I might wish for.

glitter hairspray
Highlighters (yellow Bic)
books of period styles (clothes, hair, etc), especially any with instructions
purses
hot high-heeled shoes (size 9.5 wide)
comic books
movies (anything from the 1930s starlets, 1940s film noir, 1950s romance genres, or any of those crazy Something Weird types like Olga's House of Shame or Reefer Madness)
jewelry (cheap, decorative, fabulous)
the perfect shade of retro siren lipstick
alcohol
new queer friends
lesbian porn
kittens
condoms, lube, sex toys
a top hat
a wallet
one of those plastic business card boxes
glittery drag queen makeup
anything that will make me more retro femme fabulous
a personal hairstylist
cute queer performance artists
fabulous queer geeks
anyone with a supercool sense of style
40s pinup images
retro movie posters
blank DVDs
Anything John Waters/Jack Smith/queer trashy
Annalee Newitz in live or written form
bondage cuffs
funky nailpolish colors

So if you want to send me any of these things, let me know. I will clearly love you forever.

The Universe is Trying to Test Me

As soon as I feel comfortable with where I'm at in terms of sexuality and labels, something comes along to test my limits once again. Sadly, the cute guy I've been flirting with/kinda sometimes dating for the past month is being weird and flaky, which I assume indicates either a profound ambivalence or complete disinterest. Honestly, I'm a little ambivalent about him myself, considering that he's probably not someone I can imagine being with for long periods of time. But I would have liked to have more sex with him. I fell like we could have had fun for a while before accepting that it's not meant to be. Our interests seemed to line up in some pretty exciting ways. Oh well.

But anyway, so as I've sort of but not quite given up on that, a new guy starts to flirt with me. Which is totally exciting, except that although he tells me he's trans right away, he also tells me that no one in his life except his family knows he's trans. He's completely in the closet. This is weird for me, because the one thing I am is out as queer. I'm not really interested in dating straight men, nor the identity politics inherent in lying to my friends to convince them that I'm dating a straight man. This somehow feels like it's more than I want to explain, although possibly the first transguy I was sleeping with was the biggest step in terms of labels and explanation. But really, the guy seems nice and able to carry on a decent conversation, which is rather rare and exciting in my dating history. I want to give him a chance. And I suppose it comes down to how I feel and whether I want to run away screeming or not when the time comes. One more step toward bisexual isn't really a bad thing.